Emotionally Abused No Longer

The emotionally abused no longer have to stay that way. Just the other day I was talking to a friend when the thought struck me, "if I didn't know what I am saying and where I am coming from, what he is saying to me could be thought of as emotional abuse especially by someone listening in. AND get this; what I was saying to him could also be thought of as emotional abuse by someone looking from the outside in.

If you suffer from emotional abuse there is hope for you. Physically the first thing to do is to remove yourself from the situation, be it a relationship or a location. Since verbal abuse is usually the cause of emotional abuse which can in some cases lead to physical abuse, the first thing to do is move to a place where you feel safe.

So a major way to slow down the occurrence of physical abuse is to lessen and begin to eliminate the incidences of emotional abuse by replacing verbal abuse with emotional control which leads to emotional intelligence.

I want to offer a new way to help the emotionally abused begin to get emotional control by starting at the very beginning, at the core of where it all starts and shift it from there.

Often those in the emotional intelligence field forget what I call the 1st Forgotten Fundamental of Life and that is, "The Individual Is the Meaning Maker". Every event, every happening has zero meaning until the individual gives it meaning.

This is why parents have to keep telling children over and over things like 'don't play in the street; I want you to be safe'. Parents have to continue to give instructions UNTIL the child gives a meaning to the event, in this case 'playing in the street is unsafe'. Until a child makes this meaning for him or herself parents will have to continue saying it over and over. The Individual is the Meaning Maker. Without you there is no meaning for YOU.

What does all this have to do with emotional abuse? It has a lot to do with it because an emotion is the combination of a body sensation, called a feeling with an auditory meaning attached. In other words it is the individual's interpretation of the meaningless event or happening that determines if it is abuse or not.

So what can one do?

As one of my teachers used to encourage us to give at least three different meanings to every event and only one of the meanings could be negative. One of the great benefits of this is it improved emotional intelligence since with three possible meanings it was more difficult to personalize the event and loose emotional control.


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Changing being emotionally abused to emotional control through emotional intelligence can be started by getting your FREE copy of Dr. Houston Vetter's newest book, "Train Your Thinking, The Power Portal for Long-Lasting Success" click here, http://www.TrainYourThinking.com to get your copy today.